April 8, 2009

You Want Pies With That? Brangelina Cheaters

I probably just ticked half of you off with that title, didn’t I?

Sorry about that.

But when I read that this month’s “You Want Pies With That?” Theme was Lifestyles of the Rich & Famous, I just couldn’t get past Brad and Angie. (Is “Brangelina” tradmarked? Copyrighted? I hope to hell not, or else I guess I’ll be getting a Summons in the mail that I owe the Pitt-Jolie Foundation money that they can donate to Starving Actors and their Adopted Families Fund or something of that nature.)

Anyhoo – here’s my take.

I started with Pillsbury Crescent Rolls. The Cheaters. And yeah, even though it TASTES good, and it really is CRUST…it’s still cheating if you know you are supposed to be using your OWN CRUST even though the Crescents are just so easy. Just saying, Bradley. Read into that what you will.

I rolled all 6 of them out, 2 by 2, making each pair into a large rectangle. Then I cut them each into 2 squares. (Not saying Brad and Angie are Square. Not saying that.) So I had 6. Six little crusties. Like 6 little JoPitts.

After pressing each crust into a regular sized muffin tin (with plenty of extra dough hanging out on top – get it? Extra Dough?) I filled the bottoms with a little over a tablespoon each of Milk Chocolate Chips (this represents Zahara), and Caramel Chips (for Pax and Maddox). Then I made a concoction of one brick of Cream Cheese (Shiloh, Knox and Vivi), an egg, and 1/2 cup of sugar. I beat this together with a splash of vanilla and 2 tablespoons of Nutella. I then divided it up and plopped some into each of the crusts.

After the filling was in, I pulled the tops of the crusts over each other, making little dumpling style numbers. Because those little Jolie Pitt kids are dumplings if nothing else. Have you seen Shiloh’s cute little cheeks? Or the twins? Super sweet. They can’t help who their parents are. I would have shown you a picture here, but I don’t think all 8 of them have ever been in the same place at once. I mean, I don’t think they even own a minivan, do they? Will 6 kids even fit in a minivan? Whatever. I digress.

So…Are they Pies?

I don’t know.